After an 11-year relationship ended, I moved from the suburbs to Seattle and, once an appropriate amount of time had passed, began to integrate myself into the Seattle dating scene. As I’ve gone through this new chapter in my life, I have realized a couple of things, not only in myself, but also about what this city feels like at this time of year.
As we get closer to the holidays, I find myself wondering what or how I am going to celebrate this year’s festivities. I often ponder how I want to feel during this Christmas season. My family lives in Texas, so for me to partake in “family Christmas traditions,” I’ll need to decide some things. For starters, what family do I attach myself to during the holidays? Friends? Coworkers? What a weird thing to mull over. This feeling of needing to attach myself to other family traditions brought a lot of anxiety, which I didn’t expect.
Attaching myself like a male anglerfish
This idea of needing to attach myself to someone else’s joy made me think of the male deep-sea anglerfish’s relationship to the female deep-sea anglerfish.
The male deep-sea anglerfish is a weak little being that is born without a digestive system, so upon arrival, it hunts down the female deep-sea anglerfish. The female is massive, thick, tough, and has all of its parts, including crazy teeth, and will give you nightmares if you look it up…