Ah, Ohio—the Buckeye State, where the weather is bipolar, the state shape looks like a boxing glove, and the ongoing rivalry with literally everyone is a full-time job. We’ve got Midwest charm with just enough existential dread to keep it spicy. If you haven’t launched into a full-blown rant about at least half of these, are you even a true Ohioan—or just lost between Pennsylvania and Indiana?
Table of Contents
Being the Butt of Every Joke on the Internet
“What’s so funny about Ohio?” Exactly. We’d like to know too.
The Weather Changing Like It’s Controlled by a Mood Ring
Sunny, snowing, raining frogs—all in the same afternoon.
Construction Season Lasting Longer Than Your Patience
Every highway is under construction, and every detour is worse than the original road.
Getting Asked If You Live in “The Middle of a Cornfield”
Maybe. But it’s a very charming cornfield, thank you.
The Ohio State vs. Michigan Feud Being Treated Like a Holy War
It’s not “just a game.” It’s a blood oath passed down for generations.
Being Asked What a Buckeye Is
It’s a tree nut, a chocolate-peanut-butter treat, and a state identity. Don’t overthink it.
People Forgetting We Have Cities
Yes, we have electricity, paved roads, and places called Cleveland and Columbus—look ’em up.
Lake Erie Weather Being a Menace
Beautiful one day, slapping you with lake-effect snow the next.
The Existence of Skyline Chili
Is it spaghetti? Is it chili? Is it legal? Debatable—but we’ll defend it to the death.
The Turnpike Toll Prices Feeling Personal
Just take my money and let me drive past Toledo in peace.
Tourists Saying “Oh-Hi-Oh” Like It’s Hilarious
We’ve heard it. We didn’t laugh the first time, and we won’t laugh now.
Constantly Threatening to Leave, But Never Actually Leaving
“That’s it, I’m moving to Florida!” —Said every Ohioan, still in Ohio.…