HENRICO COUNTY, Va. (WRIC) — This Veterans Day, 8News is amplifying the voices of veterans from all walks of life. Stephanie Merlo, a gay solider who served while “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” was in place, shared how that policy still haunts her decades later.
As she would have been penalized for living her authentic life because of this law, Merlo went to great lengths to hide her true self — but it came at a cost that she’s still paying today.
“‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ is no longer a thing, but it’s still a thing,” Merlo said.
Merlo decided to sign up for military service while in high school in Chesterfield County. The 9/11 tragedy was the catalyst.
“We want to give back, we want to serve our country, we want to help us grow, we want to help protect our people,” Merlo said. “And I remember how the room felt when [9/11] happened and everybody was looking at each other confused, like, ‘What does that even mean?’”
For Merlo, it ultimately meant enlisting in the army in 2003 — during a time when the U.S. Military was observing “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” which was instituted under the Clinton administration in 1994.