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- I’m a pediatrician and mom of 2. If your child has an activity every night after school, they’re overbooked. (businessinsider.com)
Over-Scheduling Kids: A Pediatrician’s Advice For Finding Balance
Pediatrician and mother of two, Dr. Dyan Hes, sees it often in her New York City practice: over-scheduled children.
Kids with every afternoon booked, struggling to find time for play, rest, or even a good night’s sleep. It’s a problem that transcends socioeconomic lines, fueled by a culture that often prioritizes packed schedules over downtime.
Dr. Hes, Medical Director of Highline Modern Medicine, offers parents practical advice for pushing back against the over-scheduling trend.
College Dreams vs. Childhood Reality
The pressure to excel is intense, with many parents hoping extracurriculars will pave the way to college scholarships. Dr.
Hes acknowledges this aspiration but emphasizes the rarity of such outcomes. The reality?
Early morning violin lessons and pre-school swim practices often lead to stress rather than scholarships.
Finding Joy, Not Just Keeping Up
It’s easy to get caught up in comparing children’s activities, but Dr. Hes stresses the importance of focusing on what brings individual children joy. Activities should be chosen for their intrinsic value, not for external validation.
The Power of “No”
Dr. Hes encourages open communication with children, making it clear that it’s okay to say no to activities that don’t resonate with them.
She recalls her own daughter quitting dance at age four, preferring ball sports instead. It’s crucial for kids to know they won’t disappoint their parents by choosing to quit, and that having fun is more important than achieving mastery.
Prioritizing Downtime
Family time is essential, and Dr. Hes recommends designating at least one night a week as a family-free night – a non-negotiable period for relaxation and connection. She also suggests limiting extracurricular activities to one or two at a time to avoid overbooking.
Less Structured Options
For busy parents who rely on after-school programs, Dr. Hes recommends less structured options like those offered at the YMCA or Boys and Girls Clubs. These environments allow children to explore various activities without the pressure of formal classes.
Beyond Sports and Screens
While encouraging physical activity is important, Dr. Hes cautions against the assumption that children must choose between sports and screens. She advocates for screen-free activities like reading, drawing, and outdoor play, emphasizing the importance of free time and relaxation for overall well-being.
Ultimately, Dr. Hes reminds parents that managing a child’s schedule is a crucial part of their health. If a child is constantly stressed, overtired, or simply not enjoying their activities, it’s time to re-evaluate and prioritize their well-being.