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- I moved in with my parents when I couldn’t afford childcare. As a single mom, they helped me get back on my feet. (businessinsider.com)
Single Mom Finds Lifeline, and Family, by Moving Back Home
For many single parents, balancing work, childcare, and finances can feel like an impossible tightrope walk. Alison Brewerton, a 45-year-old Pilates instructor and founder of Mama Strength Pilates, found her solution by doing what many might consider a throwback: moving back in with her parents. Her story is a testament to the power of family support in navigating life’s unexpected turns.
Brewerton’s journey began in 2016, when she was living near London, pregnant, and envisioning a picture-perfect family life. However, a year after her daughter’s birth, the relationship with her boyfriend dissolved, leaving her as a single, working mom and the sole mortgage holder on her apartment. The financial strain was immediate and intense.
“Financially, things got very tight,” Brewerton recounted. The cost of full-time childcare, which had been offset by her ex-partner’s presence, was now prohibitive.
Her parents, living an hour and a half away, stepped in heroically, driving multiple times a week to care for their granddaughter so Brewerton could continue teaching. Sometimes, her mother would even stay overnight to ease the travel burden. Recognizing the mounting pressure, her parents offered a more permanent solution: move in with them.
In 2019, Brewerton rented out her apartment and, with her daughter, moved into her childhood home. They shared a room, a small sacrifice that would soon prove invaluable.
Not long after, the COVID-19 pandemic struck, making the move feel even more providential. “I was so grateful to be with my parents, where we had a garden, company, and more space,” she said.
The years spent under her parents’ roof brought an unexpected bonus: a deeper familial bond. Her parents became consistent, dependable figures in her daughter’s life, a crucial role given the limited contact from her biological father. This arrangement also offered Brewerton the flexibility to build her business, taking on last-minute work with the confidence that her daughter was in loving hands.
Crucially, without the burden of rent, Brewerton was able to save money and alleviate the significant financial stress of single parenthood. She credits her parents’ “kind, patient, generous” nature for the success of the living arrangement.
While the benefits were immense, Brewerton acknowledged the need for adjustments. “I did have to adjust to their routines,” she admitted, respecting their meal times and habits.
She also found herself at times “reverting to simply being their daughter,” a welcome reprieve from the constant demands of being a single mom. The arrangement even allowed her a social life, as her parents happily cared for her daughter, enabling Brewerton to see friends and enjoy evenings out.
After two years, Brewerton had saved enough to make a down payment on a new house, closer to her parents. She felt it was time to give them back their space to fully enjoy retirement, but not at the cost of their newfound proximity and support.
Reflecting on the experience, Brewerton firmly states, “If I could go back in time, I would do the exact same, because living with them for those two years was precious for all of us.” Her story highlights how, sometimes, the best path forward involves looking back to the comfort and unwavering support of family.