BAKERSFIELD, Calif. (KGET) — If making “Anaconda” was to be compared to a marathon, director Tom Gormican would have taken a seat at about mile 10. He starts relatively strong, but each scene of the movie slows down so much it comes to a not-soon-enough halt long before the closing credits.
Need proof? One of the biggest jokes in the third act has the characters arguing over who will urinate on someone. The term biggest here refers to the painfully long time the scene goes on before coming to an abrupt ending.
Gormican’s original intention was to make a film wistfully inspired by the 1997 camp classic “Anaconda” starring Jennifer Lopez and Ice Cube. That film ended up having a host of funny moments, but they were unintentional as it was designed to be horror film…