Just then, something caught his eye. Working traffic enforcement on his BMW R 1200 RT-P, Corporal Jeff Corbin zeroed in on a Romance Red Mazda Miata executing an illegal left-hand turn. And thanks to three heaping scoops of pre-workout before his gym session, Jeff was like a carnivorous bird of prey, divebombing down to ambush yet another poor unsuspecting commuter that sped through its hunting grounds. Within seconds, Jeff smashed the start button, jumped into traffic, and stopped the Miata directly in front of Buena High School in Ventura, California.
Allow me to set the stage here. Imagine vigorous morning traffic, kids en masse flooding the entrance to the school, and a gaggle of firemen out for their morning 5K jog and juice pep step. In short, God and everybody was there to witness Jeff take charge of his traffic stop. Oh, and a key component of the story I forgot to mention: The road Jeff was patrolling was heavily crowned, so he was stopped on a steep incline. But more on that in a moment.
Jeff went through his muscle-memory dismount as usual: kill the bike, unplug the coms, identify cover and concealment, track any movements from the vehicle, and finally, lock out the kickstand and dismount. It was this last part that left Jeff cold and sober, because he suddenly realized that the bike was vertical, with almost no weight resting on the kickstand. But by then it was too late. The big Beemer stayed topside just long enough for Jeff to give it one last glimpse before it collapsed onto the cold, damp concrete and pinned itself against the curb. Little by little, Jeff’s tunnel vision faded to the sights and sounds of kids, commuters, firemen, and the man upstairs himself hooting in amusement at his predicament.
But let’s be honest. All of us, at some point or another, have been Jeff. Maybe not in full police uniform while hundreds of commuters and high schoolers laugh and point at us, but to some degree. It’s miserable (yes, I’ve been there too) because not only are you embarrassed, but you still have a downed and possibly damaged motorcycle to sort out…