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- I don’t give money at weddings anymore. My gift is my presence. (businessinsider.com)
I’ve attended at least nine weddings in recent years without bringing a gift. Traveling long distances for these celebrations adds up, and I’ve realized my presence is more valuable than a present.
My twenties and thirties have been filled with wedding-related events, often requiring cross-country travel. I used to feel obligated to give gifts, wanting to appear financially secure. Weddings are seen as a marker of adulthood, and gifts felt like part of the performance.
However, the constant expenses became unsustainable. I wanted to celebrate with my friends, but the costs were conflicting with my personal financial goals. Rather than feeling resentful, I decided to stop giving wedding gifts.
The tradition of wedding gifts feels outdated. Originally intended to help newlyweds set up their households, they seem less relevant today. Many couples live together and combine their belongings long before marriage.
Also, millennials and Gen Z face different economic realities. Student debt, low wages, and high living costs make it difficult to achieve the same financial stability as previous generations, yet wedding expectations remain high.
I prioritize being present. I’ve lived in multiple cities and countries over the past six years, and attending weddings often involves significant travel time and expense. Sharing these moments with my friends creates memories that are more valuable than any gift.
My friends don’t seem to mind the lack of gifts. When I asked, they said they hadn’t even noticed.
They appreciated my presence and effort to celebrate with them. One friend only realized I hadn’t given a gift because I wasn’t on her thank-you card list, and even then, she wasn’t bothered.
Ultimately, loved ones want you there to share their joy. While I do give a gift if I can’t attend, I believe my presence is the most meaningful gift I can offer. I value my friendships and refuse to let societal pressures dictate how I express them.
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- I don’t give money at weddings anymore. My gift is my presence. (businessinsider.com)