Additional Coverage:
- Our friends and family discouraged us from homeschooling our kids. Now grown, one of them is a pilot and the other went to college on a full scholarship. (businessinsider.com)
Against the Advice of Family and Friends, We Homeschooled Our Sons—And It Worked
When our sons were young, my husband and I attended a homeschooling conference that changed our lives. A speaker asked us to consider the traits we hoped our children would develop, like integrity, critical thinking, and curiosity, then challenged us to think about how public schools prioritized those values.
My husband was instantly convinced we should homeschool. I, on the other hand, was terrified by the idea of having our kids underfoot 24/7.
Our sons hadn’t thrived in preschool (I jokingly called them nursery school dropouts), so we decided to give homeschooling a try. Many friends were supportive, but my husband’s family (filled with advanced degrees) was aghast.
My own parents, less concerned with academic prestige but still pro-traditional education, tried to reason with us. My mother’s constant refrain was, “You will eventually send them to school, right?”
We never did. Fortunately, my husband had retired early, and I worked from home as a freelance journalist, so we had the flexibility to dedicate ourselves to this endeavor.
We joined homeschooling groups, went on field trips, and hired tutors for subjects like English and math. My husband envisioned raising “Renaissance children” with a classical education encompassing literature, debate, music, and art.
This idyllic vision, however, was often punctuated by sibling squabbles, resistance to lessons, and feelings of boredom and isolation. There were days I deeply regretted our decision, longing for the quiet of an empty house.
Despite the challenges, homeschooling worked beautifully. Our older son, musically gifted from a young age, dedicated himself to the piano.
By 13, he was attending community college, and at 16, he entered UCLA on a full scholarship to study music composition. He now teaches piano and performs on cruise ships, and he’s soon to begin his Master’s degree.
Our younger son, though less focused, pursued a variety of interests. He excelled at chess, built radio-controlled airplanes, and at 16, converted an old van into an ice cream truck. His love of aviation led to flying lessons, and at 20, he’s a flight instructor and pilot offering aerial tours.
While both sons appreciate the freedom homeschooling provided to explore their passions, they’ve also been honest about its drawbacks. They acknowledge gaps in their education, particularly in subjects like chemistry and geography. They also found it difficult to form lasting friendships without the consistent social interaction of a traditional school environment.
What’s most encouraging is that despite these shortcomings, both say they’d likely homeschool their own children, albeit with some modifications. Hearing them say, “We’d do it differently, but still, we’d do it,” is incredibly validating, especially given the initial resistance we faced.
More than their future parenting choices, I’m proud of the thoughtful, well-rounded, and productive young men they’ve become—the very qualities we hoped for all those years ago at that fateful conference.