Every driver has, at some point, sat on the shoulder of a road watching those red and blue lights flash in the rearview mirror while frantically rehearsing their defense. Most of us land somewhere between “I swear I wasn’t going that fast” and dead silence. But according to the folks who actually write the tickets, some drivers take a much more creative route.
The Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department recently posted a video on Facebook that leans into the mockumentary format, complete with a deputy sitting down for what looks like a serious interview segment, helmet on, forehead sweat getting dabbed off between takes, and a producer asking which camera to look at. It is a bit that plays it straight, and that is exactly what makes it funny.
Once the cameras roll, the deputy does not disappoint. He explains, with the calm delivery of someone who has genuinely seen it all, that he has heard just about every excuse in the book. And after years on the road, a few of them have apparently earned a permanent spot in his memory…