Satire – Prehistoric Pharmacy Run: Woolly Mammoth Caught on Camera in Minnesota CVS

MINNEAPOLIS, MN – In a scene straight out of a science fiction movie, shoppers at a Minneapolis CVS were stunned to find themselves in the company of a prehistoric giant – a woolly mammoth. Eyewitnesses report that the mammoth, seemingly unfazed by its anachronistic presence, was spotted perusing the health and beauty aisle with a shopping basket delicately held in its trunk.

“It was just surreal,” said Jenny Clarkson, a local shopper. “One moment I’m choosing a shampoo, and the next, I’m standing next to a creature from the Ice Age. It seemed very interested in the organic section.”

The mammoth, described as surprisingly well-mannered, reportedly took a particular interest in the hair care products. CVS staff, while initially bewildered, showed commendable professionalism by asking the mammoth if it needed help finding anything. The mammoth, unable to respond, continued its shopping in silence.

Authorities were called to the scene but were hesitant to approach the gentle giant. “We’re trained for many situations,” stated Officer Dan Hughs, “but nothing quite like this. We decided it was best to let it finish shopping and go on its way.”

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