Satirical AND TRUE: Florida Man Chooses UberEats Rating Over Missing Child!

Florida… you’ve done it again. You’ve managed to make the news in a way that’s equal parts horrifying, confusing, and—let’s be honest—impressively stupid. This time, an Orlando man was arrested after a young child was found running naked toward Interstate 4. Because apparently, in Florida, even toddlers are trying to escape traffic on I-4.

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