Author’s note: This is the ninth installment of my weekly column, Barely Relevant. I’m pretty sure your wife watches “Legends of the Fall” while you’re watching the Seattle Seahawks. Every time. She doesn’t get sick of it. She makes quinoa and cucumbers and puts the pillows where she wants them and gets all excited about watching a movie where Brad Pitt leaves and then returns six or seven times. Seriously, he’s always arriving on a horse from over a hill somewhere.