These Bizarre Old School Life Hacks From Print Magazines Are Pretty Darn Useless

It seems that there’s a life hack for just about everything these days.

Some of them are pretty darn useful. Like putting your hanging clothes it trash bags and tying them like this when you’re moving.

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Or this amazing way to apply bandages that prevent the strip from slipping off while you go about your life.

But not all life hacks are created equal, and some are ultimately kind of pointless. Like whoever told you to use a can opener to cut through plastic clam-shell packaging fails to realize that a knife would work just as well.

Then there are some life hacks that are downright silly and/or useless. Like this assortment of curated weirdness that Jess McGuire posted to Twitter.

These “hacks” feature zingers like destroying your jump ropes.

And using a piece of string to replace your belt.

Writers from these magazines tend to have an obsession with using feminine hygiene products for tasks other than the one they’re intended to perform.

Or giving yourself that coveted Kardashian-post-op look.

Have a bloody nose or are throwing a Halloween party? Hope you have some tampons handy! (The bloody nose thing is actually useful; the ghost trick is not.)

Hate door-to-door solicitors? Turns out they hate silly hats combined with death stares!

If you can’t afford to buy a bag of after-dinner mints, then you probably shouldn’t be hoodwinking your guests into eating toothpaste anyway.

This “budget GPS” system is…I just don’t know what to say about it.

Tin foil has plenty of uses you would have never thought of. Like protecting your kicks from poop.

If you’re having a cup of tea, you’re obviously also enjoying a piece of pie, so use its pan as a coaster. Duh.

Hands cold while drinking a cup of tea? Don’t put your hand on your cup like some normie, take your used teabag and throw it into a plastic bag.

Speaking of tea, don’t you hate it when you beverage gets cold? Well fret not!

Think cereal boxes go in the trash? Think again!

Cereal cocktail! Mmmm, my favorite. Nothing says delicious breakfast like a bit of Trix mixed with Honey Bunches of Oats and some stale cocoa puff remnants.

You can keep these life hacks to yourself, I’ll take the conventional route for now. Thanks.