When I had my cancer scare a few years ago the specialist was trying to make small talk while we waited for the results of the biopsy to come in and he asked me to describe the worst pain I had ever experienced. I knew he was trying to prepare me for the possibilities ahead but my mind didn’t go to memories of physical pain, it went to the moment I stood by my sister and my brother-in-law in a hospital some 20 years ago when a sheriff deputy informed them in a hallway that their young son passed away in a tragedy earlier that day. He punched a wall and she let out a sound I had never heard before and I don’t ever want to hear again. That was real pain – a pain I could only imagine.